Its a pretty day here in Troutman NC.Was up early again this morning ,hubby had a really bad insulin reaction.he couldn't even talk.I didn't even chk it first juts started giving him juice.after 2 glasses of juice and a candy bar I chkd it and it was 54.we had the same thing happen Sat morn , same time, only he was very combative.Almost had to call rescue squad. He is going to have to titrate his insulin again, It really scares me.So now he is sleeping, he crashes after one like this.Other than that it was a peaceful night!!
I have been hearing on the news about suicides and even a man that took his whole familys life and his, over losing his job and not being able to face the unknown. This is so sad..I know what they feel like, we have been there a couple times. But we need to look around and see what we have and be thankful for even the air we breath.
In 99 we lost everything, we had a thriving business with a 6 figure income, a beautiful home, new cars, and it was gone overnight because of our partner and his foolish lifestyle that we did not know about.It was the worst time of our lives, we had to move into a sleazy hotel, pawn somthing we owned everyday , just to eat and pay the hotel bill.
It was really hard on my husband, he fell into a deep deep depression and the only thing I knew to do was to write his sis, in Fla. and tell her what happened, I knew they would be calling and would not be able to reach us at home or office, so without telling hubby, I did. A couple days later she called the hotel and said she was wiring the money to move us to Fla and she had a small mobile home that was empty that they had up for sale that we could live in till we get back on our feet.So off to Fla we went...we had managed to keep one vehicle from the finance co. till we got to Fla..the other 2 we turned in, we knew we would not be able to pay for them.then once in Fal we turned it in also.My hubby was severly depressed.for about a yr he stayed in bed...and I am not kidding.I started taking him to the V A hsop in Tampa since we had no health ins, and for the first time in his life he was on medication and still is.we were in fla for about 1 and a half yrs till he got his ss and we moved back to NC.we went from a 6 figure income to less than 20,00 a yr.Its been rough,I remember in 2007 on thanksgiving, I had told my kids to not come over for dinner that day , it was because we had no food and I did not want to tell them.me and hubby ate canned vegetables, and a slice of bread, even my little dog was so hungry she ate a can of peas,but you know that was one of the best thanksgivings I had.I sat there and thanked the Good Lord for my food that I did have and that me and hubby still had each other.we have had many days like that.But I am so thankful for what I do have and that we have been together for 31 yrs.All the mess we have been through the past 9 yrs has brought us so much closer.We still do not have a car.That bothers my hubby more than anything. Its funny we have car ins and no car.Have to keep ins or we would lose our license.!!!My son bought us an old one a yr ago but it only lasted a couple months.Thats kinda hard asking for rides.and you just can't go when you need to...but maybe someday we can have one again. I have learned to trust God.It has really taught me to lean on him for my needs. He will take care of us, might not be a steak dinner, it might be canned vegetables, but he will supply. He never said he would give us all we want, he said he would suppply our needs.I need a refrigerator really bad and my mattress is so bad I sleep a lot in recliner cause my back cannot stand it..And I cannot have the back surgerys I need cause I have to take care of my Husband right now.But am thankful I have an old recliner I can sleep in and my fridge is hanging on, if barely !!!.People have put to much trust in the all mighty dollar.and it will fail.But God will never fail..My prayer is if someone is considering taking their life, please don't, ask for help, call your Dr.And call out to God to give your strength and to guide you.and stop and look around. I know you can find one thing that you are thankful for.Everyone is in the same boat during this time.We need to lift each other up and pray for one another.